Three ‘harmless’ bites, Mike Tyson and Guantanamo Bay… Can’t wait to read this Luis Suarez chapter:

Don't compare the Uruguayan to Iron Mike or he may do something 'harmless' to you...

The drip-feed of Luis Suarez quotes, mea-culpa and 'I'm the victim here' declarations continue with the latest revelations that Steven Gerrard talked the striker out of a move to Arsenal and his assertions that bites one, two and three were more like playful nibbles. 'I was treated like a criminal,' Suarez protests in the pages of his My Life autobiography as he discusses the FIFA sanctions imposed after his chomp at Giorgio Chiellini during the World Cup. He claims the Italian defender ran across his path on three occasions without receiving a warning from the referee. For the third time in his career, Suarez took matters into his own teeth. 'It was my fault... although I was an easy target,' he states. 'Biting scares a lot of people, but it is relatively harmless.' 'None of my bites were like Mike Tyson's on Evander Holyfield,' Suarez is quoted in Marca. 'But nobody cares about that.' The biting chapter closes with Barcelona signing Suarez and trusting him so much that no 'do not take a gnash at someone again' clause was included in his contract. When he was finally introduced to his Barca team-mates, he likens it to a warm round of applause for a prisioner released from Guantanamo Bay. All's well that ends with a £10m-a-year contract.