The only dabbing going on post-game might have been the dabbing away of some tears.
The Carolina Panthers were six-point favourites going into Super Bowl 50 but have been consigned to the scrapheap of ambitions that’s built on that old adage, “defences win Super Bowls”.
It wasn’t so much a case of the old sheriff Peyton Manning out-gunning the young, cocky pretender Cam Newton, but more Newton’s fellow class of 2011 first round draft pick, Von Miller, leading the Orange Crush defence to a suffocating 24-10 victory.
NFL MVP Newton was sacked seven times at Levi’s Stadium so it was not surprising when he turned up to his post-match press conference in an absolute fouler.
Wearing his hood over his head and staring downwards throughout, Newton looked like he would rather be anywhere else in the world rather than facing a gaggle of journalists determined to extract some thoughts from the biggest star in the league.
It goes straight into the top four bad loser interviews, all of which possess a specific quality that makes them stand out from the Louis Van Gaals and Jose Mourinhos of this world.
No true competitor should like losing, but these lads take it to the next level.
The Sulk
Newton is a larger than life character whose cocky performances and (for some reason) infamous “dab” celebration have sparked debates about race relations in the United States.
Huge for a QB at 6ft5in, Newton ran for 10 touchdowns this season and he completed another rush, out the door, after less than two minutes of a ball-achingly awkward interaction with the hacks.
He uttered a mere 18 words during the press conference, none of which were “I’m here so I don’t get fined“.
The questions are pretty irrelevant, so we’ve given you just the surly 26 year old’s side of the conversation.
“We’ll be back.”
“No.”
“We got outplayed, man.”
“We got outplayed.”
“Nothing different.”
“No.”
“We lost.”
“No.”
“No.”
And he was gone.
The Potential Homicide
England full-back Mike Brown does not enjoy losing.
The only thing he dislikes more than losing is having to discuss said loss in the immediate aftermath.
A World Cup defeat on home soil to noisy neighbours Wales meant the broody Harlequin was fit to be tied during a now infamous post-match interview.
Brown somehow managed, while never being rude, to exude a latent menace that the late, great James Gandolfini all but patented for his role as Tony Soprano.
It is our lot as sports journalists to ask questions (often ridiculous) to coax words out of sportspeople’s mouths in the aftermath of a game.
In fairness to Brown he was having none of it and may have committed hackicide had he been asked one more question about why Wales won and England lost.
Look at that stare.
The Tinfoil Hat
One Championship win since Clare’s 2013 All-Ireland win and Davy Fitzgerald, always a volatile character, is becoming a little frayed around the edges.
Last season we were told the manager would be sharing the media duties with his selectors and the Banner County even hired a public relations operative to help smooth some of Davy’s sharp edges.
That plan lasted about 70 minutes into the Championship summer as Clare’s Munster SHC defeat to Limerick saw Fitzgerald donate another classic post-match interview to the canon.
RTÉ’s Clare McNamara does a wonderful job in trying to provoke a referee evisceration out of Fitzgerald, who struggles to make eye contact with the interviewer.
“I have no comment to make and that’s it,” is Fitzgerald’s stock answer, while making it blatantly clear he holds referee Colm Lyons solely responsible.
Is discipline a problem, he is asked: “Maybe it is for Clare, I dunno about anyone else.”
And, you know, jet fuel can’t melt steel beams.
Take the dog to “the farm”
Ireland draw at home to Cyprus, sealing Germany and the Czech Republic’s qualification for Euro 2008 and sealing Steve Staunton’s fate.
It has been a disastrous campaign and a disastrous period in Irish football, one which would draw to a close seven days later with the sacking of Staunton.
An absolute legend as a player, his legacy was seriously scuffed by a 21-month term in charge of the Republic of Ireland – a job he was clearly under-qualified to do.
In his final post-match interview with RTÉ you can see the pain he is feeling and his frustration that the players are, for whatever reason not capable, of carrying out his plan.
He stops short of blaming them outright, he is the gaffer, but by this stage he is a gaffer with a haunted thousand-yard stare.
He has seen things that can’t be unseen. Like an evening with Andy O’Brien in Nicosia.
