Paul Galvin’s majestic, rambling tale about his first Kerry GAA trial is why the internet was invented

'Two glutes were like cap nuts from the night before'

Kevin McGillicuddy

Paul Galvin’s majestic, rambling tale about his first Kerry GAA trial is why the internet was invented

Paul Galvin has brought us a slice of cold hard nostalgia and we’ve gobbled it up.

We really, really wish we were travelling with Paul Galvin on a journey today because we really do not know where it may end up.

The Kerry footballer is recently back in the Kingdom panel and, today, on Instagram, revealed a frankly magnificent story from his early days in green and gold under Paidí O’Sé.

We were intrigued when we saw the pair of adidas boots, which got us thinking of our own days playing ball in the summertime. Galvin’s story is so much more than a mental trundling about studs vs. mouldies.

The former All-Ireland winner discusses his tight glutes, knocking Maurice Fitzgerald off a treatment table, throwing his boots into the stand in Fitzgerald stadium and so much more.

Truly, madly, deeply, you need to read the entire post to comprehend

We’d love to hear what Maurice Fitzgerald remembers from this infamous session.

The classic World Cups. I remember I wore them on my 1st trial for KY under Paidi during the hot summer of 02. I was 20. I landed into the dressing room & cleared Maurice Fitz off the massage table cos two glutes were like cap nuts from the night before. Says I to the female physio “I’m flat out siring young ones around town therefore my two glutes are tighter than the nuts on a hubcap, will you stick an elbow in em an loosen em out like a good woman til out go out an kick points all round me.” I remember Fitzy staring at me as he stood on one leg next to the table. Says I with a wink “tight glutes, can’t shoot Fitzy bah.” Though he looked terribly pissed off about something I could tell he enjoyed that line. I moseyed out loose as a goose in my WCs anyway & spent 10 minutes practicing chip ups on the run in front of Paidi until we were about to start the warm up when as I was flying full-pelt into my last chip up my studs caught the turf &sent me into a runfall before capsizing on head over tits. It was the perfect start in a way as Paidi got to see something of my determination in that little cameo. It’s was a good 10metres before I eventually succumbed to the inevitable fall though in my mind it was far from inevitable. With each step I fought bravely to regain equilibrium until eventually I did the smart thing & ploughed into Fitzy as he was walking out. That arrested my fall of course. Pure cute. With that I let out a string of f*cks & lassoed the World Cups up into the stand as I went back into the dressing room for my Copas just so Paidi was clear that it was the boots that caused my fall and no lack of skill. I got the graze on my knee patched up before returning halfway thru the session. Luckily enough i kicked 1 point from 7 attempts on goal on the night before pulling up with what I think was dehydration. I got my post-session rub down anyway & waited in the car park for Paidi so i could order another pair of Copas to replace the World Cups i lassoed over the stand. Somehow I didn’t make the panel in 02. There’s a lesson for us all in that. The World Cups are classics but they’d make a fool of you in summer. Be careful out there lads. #chipups

A photo posted by Paul Galvin (@pgal10) on Apr 28, 2015 at 7:21am PDT