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Football

15th Sep 2016

Liverpool’s Loris Karius issues perfect response to rumoured romance with pregnant actress

Welcome to England, Loris

Ben Kiely

Congratulations Loris Karius, you’ve made it.

The Earth will continue to spin, technology will improve, new discoveries will be made and diseases will be cured, but the one thing that remains constant in this strange world is that professional footballers will be be linked to romances with relatively minor celebrities.

While it’s mostly players in the English leagues who fall victim to these nonsensical rumours, there are a few notable exceptions.

The latest of these trashy rumours to do the rounds on the Red Tops involves Liverpool’s 22-year-old goalkeeper Loris Karius, who was snapped up from Mainz for £4.7 million in the summer transfer window.

Karius hasn’t got a chance to shine for the Reds yet after he suffered a broken hand in training, but his luck in winning the genetic lottery that caused so many people to swoon over him when Liverpool signed him has turned him into a bit of a celebrity east of the Irish Sea.

With Karius out of the public eye due to injury, a rumour began circulating claiming he had become romantically involved with a pregnant actress called Stephanie Davis. Our extensive research (Wikipedia) tells us that she is 23-years-old, from Merseyside and she stars in something called Hollyoaks.

Yeah, Karius doesn’t really know who she is either.

That’s one way to kill a bullshit rumour. This kid’s learning quickly.

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