Manchester United have a global music partner and it is not Spotify.
Nope, it is Deezer, the ‘other’ streaming service. The one with the ad featuring the adorable dogs.
It of course makes sense for a corporate behemoth like United to sign up a music partner, to along with their paint partner, formal wear partner and the 23 other global partners they currently have.
Just a shame the music could not have been added when Louis Van Gaal was still at the club. The man could move and may have drawn inspiration from a thoughtfully compiled playlist being piped into his Carrington office.
But top-level football and corporate deal-making are brutal business and the Deezer deal came after the rambunctious Dutchman was replaced by Jose Mourinho, who strikes us as a man who dances as if someone is watching all the time.
To celebrate Tuesday’s momentous deal, we have put together a playlist for Manchester United.
1. Robert De Niro is Waiting by Bananarama
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhWE0we4FaQ
Jose is a big fan, supposedly.
2. The Sound of Silence by Simon and Garfunkel
No amount of 1980s pop can prevent Jose’s natural demeanour oozing out: “Hello darkness, my old friend”.
3. Mr Jones by Counting Crows
In honour of the resurgent (this week) Phil Jones. Fans of the no-nonsense defender will be glad to hear the song is not about lead singer Adam Duritz’s penis, as sometimes claimed.
4. I’ll be there for you by The Rembrandts
In honour of David de Gea, a friend to United’s defence.
5. Money by Pink Floyd
Because Paul Pogba.
6. Thursday’s Child by David Bowie
Europa League, innit?
7. Wayne’s World Theme Tune
Because it is Wayne’s world and we all have to live in it.
8. I just can’t help myself by the Four Tops
Ask that poor water bottle.
9. My Boo by Alicia Keys and Usher
Marouane Fellaini needs something to drown out the crowd.
10. This is the One by The Stone Roses
We would hardly leave it off now, in fairness
