Sacre Vert. (We’re really stepping our game up with the puns)
Former France manager Raymond Domenech has revealed that he’d like to manage the Irish national team one day.
Domenech guided Les Bleus to the 2006 World Cup final (the Zidane final) where France lost on penalties to Italy before going on to become something of a national joke in subsequent tournaments.
The admission came in an interview with Ma Chaine Sport and has caused many Irish fans, this one included, to ponder about the colourful past of the 63-year-old and what he could bring to L’Aviva hotseat when Martin O’Neill hangs up his managerial hat.
It’s in the stars
The Frenchman has a keen interest in astrology which we’re sure would translate well to the Ireland squad.
“When I have got a Leo in defence, I’ve always got my gun ready, as I know he’s going to want to show off at one moment or another and cost us,” Domenech once said.
That’s a bad omen for Richard Keogh who was born on August 11, smack dab in the middle of Leo territory.
Poor proposal timing
We’re still cringing after Domenech’s bizarre choice of timing when proposing to his girlfriend.
After crashing out of Euro 2008, the old Romantic thought that a post-match interview was the perfect stage to ask for his beloved’s hand in marriage, saying: “I have only one project, which is to marry Estelle. I told myself there are beautiful things in life. It’s good to tell someone that you love her.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eruBfzcZhLM
Mourinho bashing
In his book Mon dico passione du foot, Domenech has a right old go at Jose Mourinho, who began his career in management after securing a gig as a translator.
Domenech writes: “That’s the problem with translators, there comes a time when they convince themselves they wrote the text themselves.”
That Handball
To be fair, we’re not saying that Domenech had anything to do with Thierry Henry’s decision to handle the ball in the build-up to the goal which crushed Irish hearts in World Cup 2010 qualification.
But we don’t think he’d exactly be welcomed with open arms to the Aviva considering he was in the dugout for one of the most frustrating days for Irish football fans.
England B Team
If that doesn’t piss off the Irish faithful then maybe his pre-game thoughts on the boys in green might.
Before the above infamous match, Domenech referred to the Ireland national team as “a sort of England B side.”
That’s not the kind of thing we’d hold a grudge over, right?
French Rebellion
It was under Domenech’s less than watchful eye that the famous mutiny in the French camp of the 2010 World Cup took place.
Nicolas Anelka, who Domenech would go on to describe having a personality like “Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde,” was sent home from South Africa.
Other rebels such as Franck Ribery, Thierry Henry and Patrice Evra were left out of France’s must-win final group game against the hosts in a bold stupid move and Les Bleus predictably lost 2-1.
Handshake? What handshake?
In one of the more disrespectful acts of a manager of club or country, after the aforementioned loss to South Africa, Domenech refused to shake the hand of Carlos Alberto Parreira.
Zero flips given
After failing to get his team performing on the world stage and being largely considered the worst coach ever to manage France, Domenech did the only logical thing a manager can do. He starred in a poker ad.
The advertisement for Bwin France features Ray leaving the dressing room and travelling to Thailand to learn the discipline to be a world-class poker player. Bizarre.
He knows how to win games
The Lyon man offers staggering insight into the nuances of how to come out on top in a game of football.
His unmatchable wisdom was summed up in this quote: “You always lose when your opponents score and you don’t.”
Genius!
All things considered, don’t hold your breath on a John Delaney/ Raymond Domenech meeting any time soon.
