As Deadline Day Godfather Jim White would put it, hold onto your hats folks because the clock is ticking.
We’ve already predicted an hour-by-hour account of the whole rigmarole of this day and how it will play out, but now that it’s here and the rumour mill is in full flow, we’re keeping on top of things as they happen (or as they’re supposed to have happened anyway).
From random footballers pumping gas off the M1, wondering into estate agents in the middle of the town and a friend of a friend of a friend who has a cousin working in the canteen of a training ground somewhere in England, it’s all go today. So we’re bringing you the rumours – however ridiculous – as they happen.
Straight off the bat, there’s a Premier League return on the cards for a certain Uruguayan attacker.
My uncles,mates,brothers,cousins, daughters,best mates,dogs,ex owner has just spotted Diego Forlan at Birmingham Airport #theglobalsearch
— ….. (@IamTils) February 2, 2015
A couple of international superstars have been dining in England this morning.
https://twitter.com/roygrizzle/status/562152232037404672
https://twitter.com/PauliePooBum/status/562154204341764096
Liverpool are about to lose a player and unfortunately it doesn’t look to be Balotelli yet.
Just seen Joe Allen at a service station in Norwich looking miserable and being instructed to "do as he's told" by his agent #DeadlineDay
— Daniel Boden (@DBoden512) February 2, 2015
Andy Carroll has sparked talk of a move to Celtic from West Ham after showing up in Glasgow – allegedly.
Andy Carroll spotted at Glasgow airport reportedly heading to Lennoxtown.
— Paul Browne (@officialchalker) February 2, 2015
City and United set to battle for Wesley Sneijder before the 11pm deadline.
https://twitter.com/Jamafrika/status/562179583915864064
Wilfried Zaha was expected to sign permanently for Palace today but ‘reliable sources’ suggests otherwise.
https://twitter.com/ellisleeBC/status/562183252593889281
There are few big names pondering a comeback by the looks of things.
https://twitter.com/DavidMakey/status/562184049322897408
We had predicted Ronaldo to Rochdale, but Messi to Bury looks even more likely right now.
Just seen Messi at M65 services … He tells me Bury made him “An offer he couldn’t refuse” #deadlineday
— LFCMav⭐️JFT96 (@Koptin) February 2, 2015
Poor John Obi Mikel could be dropping from the top of the Premier League to the Conference North within the hour.
@AFCFYLDE I've just seen John Obi Mikel with a water pistol outside Tescos, is a move to AFC Fylde possible? #DeadlineDay #AinsleyReporting
— Ainsley Harriott (@TasteMyChowder) February 2, 2015
Liverpool are about to enter another Konoplyanka deadline day saga.
https://twitter.com/ChalkonBoots/status/562198454018244608
Seb Veron always did things at his own pace.
Just seen Juan Sebastian Veron out of the window going down the river in a canoe. #DeadlineDay #ColU
— Oli Broom (@olibroom) February 2, 2015
Jermaine Defoe is in for a fight for his place at the Stadium of Light.
https://twitter.com/AliTheRedeemer/status/562199860162871296
Sources in Cork are keeping us posted on the big story.
My uncle working at @manairport just text saying #mufc private plane left for Dortmund Airport 10 mins ago. Hummels en route?? #DeadlineDay
— James O'Donoghue (@odonoghuejames) February 2, 2015
But there may be substance to James’ reports. A round trip to Germany would only take 40 minutes, right?
Very strong source has told me that Mats Hummels has been spotted at manchester airport T2 #mufc #DeadlineDay #dortmund
— Tom and Dan (@TomDanOracles) February 2, 2015
Apparently hummels and reus have been spotted at Manchester airport #deadlineday #ManUtd
— alexander petrie (@alexp_mufc9) February 2, 2015
A Football Manager legend could be set to come out of retirement if the rumours are true.
https://twitter.com/Luke_Fletcher_/status/562200391996411904
But his compatriot won’t be outdone. Also a return for a Dutch superstar?
https://twitter.com/mcghee1984/status/562205445801377793
Well, we predicted Bale to United rumours and we got them.
https://twitter.com/RobDavies_7/status/562231477979860992
And there’s another Real Madrid man in the north west of England.
https://twitter.com/ChalkonBoots/status/562231853445574658
Ronald Koeman is keeping it Dutch.
Just seen huntelaar in southampton #DeadlineDay
— matthew horner (@matt25horner) February 2, 2015
Lad.
https://twitter.com/RobGWarren/status/562240043281301504
A new role for Nicklas Bendtner…
Just seen Bendtner in a taxi going to Victoria Bus Station, which was annoying as I asked him to take me to the railway station #DeadlineDay
— Howie Gosling (@Howgozza) February 2, 2015
Middlesbrough beating Arsenal to the post.
Just seen Sami Khedira at the Wolviston services on the A19 eating a Parmo.
Would be a good bit of business for the Boro. #DeadlineDay
— James Smith (@wembleypilgrim) February 2, 2015
Villa turning to an Irish man to solve their scoring problems.
Just seen Andy Keogh in the Village Green apparently he is on his way to BodyMoor Heath today for a medical #AVFC #DeadlineDay
— Pav (@RyanPJKiernan) February 2, 2015
It seems Spurs are just trying to offload Aaron Lennon anywhere.
I've just seen Aaron Lennon buying a steak bake in Leicester Fosse Park Greggs. #LCFC #DeadlineDay
— Joe Humphries (@JoeHumphriesUK) February 2, 2015
Ali Dia returns on Groundhog Day.
My mate sue runs burger van and reckons she has just seen George weahs cousin turn up at southamptons training ground #DeadlineDay
— Andy Fawcett (@drewskimalone) February 2, 2015
Salas is finally completing that United move and the main man is back.
Iv just seen Marcelo Salas and Peter Prospar having a latte and cocunut slice with Big Sam #DeadlineDay
— Ben Leonard (@Lendog1984) February 2, 2015
Villa fans united in prayer. United fans seal up the gateways.
Tom Cleverley Braced for Manchester United Recall, Latest Red Devils Rumours http://t.co/HXrKNzhXt3
— NowUnited (@NowUnited) February 2, 2015
Can he do it on a cold night at the Britannia?
https://twitter.com/KeelanYe/status/562277644876935169
Rangers losing player instead of recruiting them apparently.
Kenny Miller just seen riding the helta skelta on Brighton pier #DeadlineDay
— Shan Gambling (@shangambling) February 2, 2015