Alan Pardew appears to have two moods – smug and angry.
If the Crystal Palace manager isn’t throwing headbutts at David Meyler, you’ll find him talking about how great he is, or doing whatever the hell this is.
However, Pardew wasn’t dancing when he found out Alan Shearer wants to be England manager, and took a break from being smug to be irrationally angry.
The Match of the Day pundit revealed that he sought to be England manager in 2012, but his application was dismissed by the Football Association because of a lack of experience.
Following England’s humiliating Euro 2016 exit to Iceland, Shearer said he’d be prepared to succeed Roy Hodgson in the role, after the England manager resigned, but Pardew is having none of it.
“It makes my blood boil when pundits on TV, such as Alan Shearer, say ‘I’ll do it’,” Pardew wrote in his Daily Mail column.
“He was a top, top striker but he has no coaching qualifications and his only experience as a manager was very brief — when he took Newcastle down into the Championship.”
While Pardew may have a point, his reaction to Shearer wanting the job seems a bit OTT.
The Palace manager also ruled himself out of contention for the position, claiming that although he does want to be England manager, his focus is currently on the Premier League side.
“I want to be the England manager. It is a job I aspire to and it is an ambition of mine. But not now. Now, I have a big job at Crystal Palace and we have an important summer ahead of us. We have already made a couple of big bids and I want to build our team.”
It’s just as well, because the world is arguably not ready for Pardew as England manager, and the supreme level of smugness that would follow.